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Mayor Caught Spying on Council Rivals

MUDCAT FALLS -- According to a confidential whistleblower within the Administration, Mayor Archibald Alabaster III approved a program to apply advanced data mining techniques to spy on City Council rivals and directed the collection of sensitive personal information on political rivals.

"This violation of our basic constitutional rights is simply outrageous, but unfortunately not surprising one bit," declared Council Foreman Sorrel Needlemensch. "This Mayor's record on civil rights and respect for the rule of law is worst than the KGB, the Gestapo, J. Edgar Hoover and SPECTRE all rolled up into one."

The revelations are reminiscent of Richard Nixon, G. Gordon Liddy and the so-called "Plumbers" who broke into the Watergate Office Building to plant bugs for eavesdropping on the Democratic National Committee. Needlemensch has called for Alabaster's resignation.

"I am not a terrorist," said Needlemensch, "so the Mayor cannot trot out the tired old cock and bull story about tracking terrorists and protecting the city from attack. It just won't wash."

The Mayor's office insists that the program, known as Operation Able Shopper, was totally legal and within his authority as Chief City Administrator. The information gathering is claimed to have involved the "Googling" of council member names by his administrative assistant to determine their interests, activities, hobbies and addresses for the selection, purchase and delivery of personalized holiday gifts.

While all the Council members have denounced the program, none have returned their Christmas gifts from Mayor Alabaster.



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