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New Career for Bluesman?

PISTOL CREEK JUNCTION -- Local blues legend, Sonny "Bug Splat" Williams appears ready to embark upon a new career: race car driving.

Williams was apprehended late last week after leading authorities through Calabash County on a chase at speeds estimated at up to 110 to 115 miles per hour, until swapping paint with the black and white Five Car of Deputy Barney LaBonte, who put him into the wall.

"I was practicing, man, payin' my dues," said Williams, whose trademark bottleneck slide guitar style has been likened to the wail of alley cats in heat, at his arraignment. "You don't get to the Brickyard without practicin' your chops, Judge."

Although initially dismissed by prosecutors, the Bluesman's defense was bolstered by civil rights groups and leaders, who were quick to point out that auto-racing organizations such as NASCAR are the "last bastion of white supremacy."

"One thing I know, Negroes can drive cars fast," exclaimed Rainbow/Push Coalition founder and board member Reverend Jesse Jackson. "I mean, we go through red lights, even [drive] at night with our lights off. We can drive cars fast."

The hot pursuit, which was broadcast live by MFTV, won its local ratings time slot with a 17 share, beating both Oprah! and Judge Judy, and catching the attention of the SPEED Channel, USAC, IRL, and the Champ Car World Series. Stevie Rays Blues Club, the RK Meat Packing Company and several beverage manufacturers have expressed interest in sponsorship deals, should the musician-turned-horsepower-jockey be acquitted and get a ride.

"We expect to prevail on the merits of the case," said defense attorney Steve Dallas. "Of course, Bug Splat was complaining about getting loose towards the end of his run and if he had had the chance to get four new scuffs and a turn of wedge or two, he would of been able to hold his line and I don't think LaBonte would have been able to get his nose underneath him like he did to turn him around."

For once, FOX Sports NASCAR commentator Darryl Waltrip was speechless when he was served with a subpoena to testify as an expert witness on behalf of Williams' defense.


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